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Fight Laugh Feast Network
Fight Laugh Feast Network
TCND: Stupid Firemen and Scolding Wives (Big Cities Suck)

Who wants to live in a big city??? Not us! We’re very happy living in a small town next door to YOU, Neighbor Pkarlgh. We heard an analogy describing wives as gardeners and husbands as firefighters. But, we need to discuss the way this analogy is being exploited by insufferable church ladies who smell “smoke” constantly because their emotions cause them to set their own house on fire.

First, who’s responsible for the high cost of living in cities like LA and NYC? The Peaches and John seem to disagree whether the politicians or the citizens are to blame. But they agree about one thing: people who want to move to big cities have a screw loose. If you want to pay $1 million for a 2-bedroom house just so you can tell everyone you’re from “Weird Portland,” you deserve to be bled dry by politicians… Now, please bear with us while we tell Collin to stop clapping.

Next–we’re told women are naturally better with managing relationships than men are. Thus, some marriage counselors compare them with “gardeners.” On the other hand, men only jump into action when they’re confronted with an emergency, like firefighters. (If you can find the original source material for this analogy, PLEASE TELL US.)

Unfotunately, this analogy allows nagging wives to shout “SMOKE!” whenever they want to twist their husbands’ arms. And, if husbands don’t fight the fire in a manner she approves, wives can file for divorce and blame the firefighters for failing in their role. Christians need to pay attention to the way the culture encourages women to be more patient with their children–but more disciplinary/authoritative with their husbands!