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TCND: John Doesn't Want Fans (Lobsters and Crabs)

Hi, Neighbor Pkarlgh! As you probably don’t know, John has a Dry Bar special which periodically goes viral on social media and doesn’t impact his career in the least.

Be careful if you think you want tons of followers on social media! Trust us when we say, climbing to the “next level” of internet popularity isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.

This leads to a possible opportunity for the Peaches to be in a Whirl about something. (But we’re not sure.) (And also, John sounds like his nose is stuffed up.) Eventually, he clears his sinuses enough to read a social media post from a woman who doesn’t think her child’s father needs to be praised for “simple” things like changing diapers and washing bottles.

Why do some people focus obsessively on how much or how little encouragment is being given to them BY STRANGERS? We spend the majority of the conversation discussing the reasons you shouldn’t tear others down to make yourself feel better, nor should you fool yourself into believing that others are happier because their efforts are recognized more than your own.

Finally–does anyone know whether lobsters ACTUALLY step on each others back to get out of buckets? Email us at [email protected] to solve this mystery.

Subscribe to the John Branyan channel on YouTube and watch the Starving Comics Quarantine Show LIVE every Sunday evening at 7:00pm Eastern. Become a Comedy Clique member for exclusive content. (Details at And, finally, have your pets spayed and neutered.

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